Brexit Melee

Our President was obviously suffering from a post-Brexit party hangover on Sunday and offers the following by way of apology:

Fellow Petanquers,
Sunday 2 February offered an opportunity for another MPC Melee (rescheduled from the previous week). The weather was cloudy and cold but things were soon to warm up on the pistes. El Pres addressed the 24 keen, enthusiasts who  were totally focused on grabbing the top prize.
Round 1 was a competitive affair with 12 victors coasting along into the next round. Peter D.  and Vickie stormed to victory as did Phil R. and Roger Griffin, Roger Green and Tricia, Tony N. and Gill C., Steve and John X., and a special mention to Melys and Jane M. who gave El Pres and Jane D. a lesson in pointing. Mike congratulated the pair through blurred vision caused by the welling tears in his eyes. (A factor that obviously affected his following games).
Round 2 was fought with tenacity and skill by everyone. Peter K. managed to throw the coche onto his own piste (at times!) and Andres claimed ‘ game on zee floor ‘ after one end!!
Vickie claimed another victory together with Phil R., Roger Green, Tricia, John X. and Gill C. Only 6 players were now on 2 victories. It was all to play for in the final round and who could have predicted the outcome? (Certainly not the scorer even after the results were in!).
Round 3 began and the tension was rising. The 6 players competing for the top spot were focused, determined and making every effort to secure a victory. Who would be awarded a laurel and hardy hand-shake as the Melee champion(s)?
Vickie and Gill C. were drawn together and achieved a 13-7 victory. Phil R. and Tricia were also drawn together and in an extremely tight game against Mike and John M. secured a 13-12 win. Roger Green fell to the silky skills of Tony N. and Jane D., and John X. was more focused on his Sun. dinner than the coche. As a consequence, after the final round, 4 players were to be congratulated on successfully winning all 3 of their matches.
All that remained was for the scorer to announce the winners. Using numerical skills involving algebraic equations, trigonometric calculations and advanced mathematics, the scorer registered the top 3 places. Is the scorer ‘Brighter Than Your Average Five Year Old ?’.  Well, apparently not!
In the bar the financial rewards were allocated with an amazing result of 3 players showing totals of exactly the same scores 39-17. (Vickie, Phil and Tricia ). However! All was not as it appeared! The scorer had miscalculated!  A very observant (some might say nosey!) member noticed a discrepancy in the totals. I won’t mention your name Phil – sorry, I mean Pike! but, quite rightly, the final placings needed amendment. The final, and I mean final, (subject to TMO and VAR) results are :
1st: Vickie and Phil. – 3rd: Gill C. = 4th: Tricia.  Well done to the top four players.
Incidentally, I failed to win any games all day! However, by my calculations I managed to come 5th!!! Great day everyone. ( Also I have invested in an abacus with lovely coloured balls for future calculations!!).
                                  Mike.    El Pres.

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